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Donald Trump’s 10 very specific demands for a debate with Kamala Harris, probably.

Donald Trump

GOP presidential nominee and tender little darling Donald Trump has started casting doubt on whether he’ll show up to an agreed-upon Sept. 10 debate with Vice President Kamala Harris.

On Sunday, Trump took to social media and labeled the debate network “ABC FAKE NEWS,” asking no one in particular, “Why would I do the Debate against Kamala Harris on that network?” He mocked ABC News host George Stephanopoulos as “Liddle’ George Slopadopolus,” even though Stephanopoulos isn’t involved in the debate.

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While campaigning Monday at a Vietnamese restaurant in Northern Virginia, Trump again questioned whether he should do the debate: “I think ABC really should be shut out. I’d much rather do it on NBC. I’d much rather do it on CBS. Frankly, I think CBS is very unfair, but the best of the group. And certainly, I’d do it on Fox.”

Well, that clears things up. The two sides have been bickering over whether microphones should be on all the time or turned off when it’s not a candidate’s turn to speak. Trump seemed to undercut his campaign’s desire to keep the mics off while the other nominee speaks, saying Monday, “Doesn’t matter to me, I’d rather have it probably on.”

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Trump’s 10 VERY REASONABLE PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE DEMANDS

There will undoubtedly be more requests and disputes before Trump sprouts feathers and decides not to show up.

But to hurry things along, I’ve composed a list of all the VERY REASONABLE DEMANDS that he should make ahead of the Sept. 10 debate:

  • President Donald J. Trump will be identified at all times as either “President Donald Trump” or “President Trump.” His lectern will carry the presidential seal. Vice President Kamala Harris will be identified as “Comrade Kamala” or “Crazy Kamabla.” Her lectern will carry a hammer-and-sickle flag because she is a socialist, Marxist communist.
  • President Trump’s microphone will be on at all times and anyone who cuts it off will be given the death penalty.
  • The crowd at the debate will be the hugest crowd in the history of debates, possibly the biggest crowd anyone has ever seen in history.
  • Joe Biden must stand next to Comrade Kamala throughout the debate so President Trump can use all the “Sleepy Joe” zingers he came up with prior to Biden SO UNFAIRLY stepping aside. WHERE’S HUNTER?!?
  • Moderators will be Robert F. Kennedy Jr., President Trump’s daughter Ivanka Trump and President Trump himself.

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  • Comrade Kamala’s answers will be restricted to no more than 10 seconds because she has nothing to say and is very dull. A loud and very classy buzzer will be used to cut her off if she goes over.
  • There will be no restrictions on President Trump’s answers to ensure the debate receives the greatest ratings in the history of television.
  • There will be no fewer than three questions regarding the “late, great Hannibal Lecter.”

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  • President Trump will be served McDonald’s cheeseburgers during commercial breaks.
  • There will be only one clear winner of the debate, and that will be President Trump. If anyone suggests Comrade Kamala won, the debate will be declared RIGGED and TOTALLY BIASED and President Trump will blame it all on George Slopadopolus.
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